spacerobot123456789:

*tips fedora at hazel grace* m’taphor

tiorickyaoi:

"i need a movie where there are kickass female characters"image

"i need a movie where the main characters aren’t attractive"image

"i need a movie with annoying talking animals"

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"i need a movie where the main character lives in a swamp"

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"i need a movie that has all star by smash mouth on the soundtrack"

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escapedgoat:

xxvalleygirlxx:

When a nigga call you baby in a deep raspy voice

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When a baby call you nigga in a deep raspy voice

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rneerkat:

“i bet you cant name two structures that can hold water!” “well, dam”

(Source: rneerkat)

  • parents: okay we will be home at 11 o'clock!
  • clock: 11:01
  • me: they're dead i'm alone i need to start my orphan life now

jennlovesm5:

Awww this was a good day!

(Source: anderson)

kingcheddarxvii:

kingcheddarxvii:

Quick, without checking to see how it’s spelled, tell me this man’s name

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exemplarybehaviour:

yesterday i went to buy something and the store owner looked up and said something to me in chinese and i was so surprised i just said “what” in english and then we stared at each for a full ten seconds like what the fuck we are in spain 

hohoholdthefuckupson:

silenthill:

*puts my bro’s dick in my hand*

see, its a metaphor. it’s only gay if i jack it

See, I never jacked it, only put in in the middle of my hand. It can turn me gay but I’m not giving it the power to. A metaphor.